insecurities

a poem by Elseser

Insecurities

Learn, learn, learn,

As that is all she has seemed to acknowledge this year.

She is a growing female in this ruled, authoritative society.

She’s simply just trying to find

her place

her friends

her interests

her voice

her purpose

She is a growing female, poised and free. Her elegance

Is inspiring, a beauty of a young woman.

Her white wings grow strong, surely enough to keep her alive, right?

All of a sudden,

Their sharp words, my over-thinking, his societal expectations, her judgement, and your intentions cut into me like a trenchant blade, taking my will along with it.

The sureness in my own choices slowly fades like that of water vapor on the bathroom mirror after a bath. I start to see a blurry vision of myself, grasping onto the false words of others as truth.

Announced by them:

“Does she ever talk?”

My white wings grew gray, getting smaller and smaller, unable to keep myself at the height of the clouds. As my height decreases, I helplessly flail towards the cemented ground.

As this year moves on, and similar with life, I will find a sense of

my place

my friends

my interests

my voice

my purpose

So be free and spread those wings

I say